On this hot July day
Basking in the sun,
Eyes closed against the strong rays
Two years here alone
Two summers without you
A lifetime between then and now
But I find I’m…
Still waiting to hear the back door slam
You, back from your bicycle ride
Still waiting to feel your shadow cross my face… Read the blog
Rick and I were married on July 12, 1997. He died one month after our twentieth anniversary. This Friday will mark the second time I’ve spent our anniversary alone. In a way, it’s almost the third time, because on our last anniversary together in 2017, he was pretty sick and often mentally confused, so our special day wasn’t so special. … Read the blog
My mom once told me…
That people in heaven can’t see us
She said heaven is a happy place, a peaceful place that our loved ones go to when they die
She said earth is a sad place
So people in heaven can’t see us hurting, sick, sad, and depressed
Or they would be sad, too.
My mom once told … Read the blog
If you were here this morning,
You would have urged me out of bed
“C’mon it’s a beautiful day!” you’d say
And convince me to eat breakfast on the deck
When we were finished, you’d say,
“Let’s get this pool open – you love to swim. It won’t take long…”
And we’d work together, side by side…
You with your … Read the blog
I’m a Game of Thrones fan and I’m also a lover of medieval-sounding music, so I really enjoyed the new song, “Jenny of Oldstones,” by Florence + the Machine on last night’s episode. I downloaded it today from Amazon music and was listening to it sitting out under the gazebo in the hour I have between getting off work and … Read the blog
One thing I’ve learned about widowhood is that it’s exhausting; it’s so much work. At first, it’s trying to make it through the long awful days without your husband. Being bombarded with memories and tears. Adapting to the empty house. Working to control your emotions in public. Striving to get out of bed each morning to face another painful day … Read the blog
I’ve heard it said a million times about the grief journey – the progress towards healing is two steps forward, one step back.
I guess this week I’ve taken a step back.
A few days ago, I wrote about my decision to remove my wedding ring, well, not actually remove it, but move it from my left hand to my … Read the blog
I do my best to fill my weekends. I’ve had a year and a half to hone my skills. When Rick was alive, I used to look forward to Fridays, the last day of the work week and then – Whee! Freedom! Rick and I could hang out together, starting with breakfast at our favorite diner, then – depending on … Read the blog
How can you be gone?
I repeat this question to myself at least once a week, sometimes out loud, usually accompanied by a silent sob.
I guess I’m getting better. It used to be several times a day, and – in the weeks after you died – it was several times an hour.
True, as life and time … Read the blog
Wow! My books are listed on Goodreads.com, and I’m officially a Goodreads author! It was quite a surprise to see them there when I did a search, yesterday. I’m guessing they include all books that are available on Amazon, but seeing them there made me feel like an “official” author!
It’s still a little unsettling to realize that I’ve … Read the blog