Jenny and Her Ghosts

grief journey

I’m a Game of Thrones fan and I’m also a lover of medieval-sounding music, so I really enjoyed the new song, “Jenny of Oldstones,” by Florence + the Machine on last night’s episode. I downloaded it today from Amazon music and was listening to it sitting out under the gazebo in the hour I have between getting off work and Read the blog

The Vision Board: Rediscovering Hope

grief journey

One thing I’ve learned about widowhood is that it’s exhausting; it’s so much work. At first, it’s trying to make it through the long awful days without your husband. Being bombarded with memories and tears. Adapting to the empty house. Working to control your emotions in public. Striving to get out of bed each morning to face another painful day … Read the blog

One Step Back

grief journey

I’ve heard it said a million times about the grief journey – the progress towards healing is two steps forward, one step back.

I guess this week I’ve taken a step back.

A few days ago, I wrote about my decision to remove my wedding ring, well, not actually remove it, but move it from my left hand to my … Read the blog

My Funny Valentine

grief journey

I do my best to fill my weekends. I’ve had a year and a half to hone my skills. When Rick was alive, I used to look forward to Fridays, the last day of the work week and then – Whee! Freedom! Rick and I could hang out together, starting with breakfast at our favorite diner, then – depending on … Read the blog

Aftershocks

Dear Rick,

How can you be gone?

I repeat this question to myself at least once a week, sometimes out loud, usually accompanied by a silent sob.

I guess I’m getting better. It used to be several times a day, and – in the weeks after you died – it was several times an hour.

True, as life and time … Read the blog

With This Ring

grief journey

Yesterday marked 17 months since my husband died. So much has changed in my life since then. I’ve grieved, and grieved, and grieved some more. I’ve worked through the grief, written through the grief, talked to my grief counselor, cried on the shoulders of family and friends, and – to be honest – I’m really, really tired of grieving. Shouldn’t … Read the blog

Widow Movies

widow movies

I’ve always been a movie buff. I love them second only to books. It was only natural that I’d seek out some movies that relate to my life now, so I checked out a couple of “widow movies.”

I have to say, they may be lovely romances, but they aren’t something I could really relate to. Man dies. Gorgeous, perfect … Read the blog

On the Cusp of a New Life

I’m on the cusp of a new life, but it’s difficult to leave the old one behind. And, if I’m honest with myself, I feel guilty and sad, regretful that I have been able to survive without Rick, that I am making that new life on my own.

When Rick died, I never thought this would be possible – to … Read the blog